I always set goals at the beginning of the year, and even though I don’t expect to meet them immediately (remember those small steps I wrote about in my newsletter?), some have come to a screeching halt.
For example, my goal to run a half marathon. While I haven’t given up on it, last week brought a number of injuries that made me question the wisdom of setting this goal. Yet, I am not willing to give up. I will get to the reason why shortly.
Like you, I’ve generally set goals about losing 20 – 30 pounds; getting in shape, learning something new – and, every year – I make the same goal. You know the definition of insanity – right? Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
I am not willing to do that this year – and, I imagine that you feel the same way. THIS YEAR MUST BE DIFFERENT! So, how do you and I reach a fuller potential?
- First things first – don’t beat yourself up over past mistakes! You learned something – you learned what doesn’t work, so consider that a lesson well worth it.
- Second – know that goals are an end point. They can point the ‘direction’ – but, they can’t tell you the ‘how’ to get there. As you know, there are multiple routes that you can take in order to get ‘here to there’ (if you remember the first bullet point – you already know some routes that don’t work, so cross them off your list). You need to set up a process (or map) to get you where you are going. Your process may be different than that of anyone else – but, you need to set up time to state what you are going to do in order to reach your goal – then schedule it. You can always tell a person’s priorities – if it’s scheduled – then it has a ranking of importance in that person’s life.
- Case in point, I want to learn a language this year. The language learning tool that I am using is a 30 minute per day commitment. So, I have blocked off 30 minutes 6 days a week to spend time learning and practicing. This little step (on an almost daily basis) should get me to my goal.
- Third – understand your ‘identity’. What? You know who you are – but, in order to make the habits (which help you reach your goals), your goals must be congruent with your future identity as a person who can reach that goal.
- For example, if I hold the belief that I don’t follow through on anything and am a failure (don’t we all have this feeling from time to time?) then, I will not follow through and WILL fail. But, if I instead re-orient my thinking and actions as someone who does follow through and succeeds – then, I have a much better chance of success. Now, are you necessarily going to fully believe this major change in how you perceive yourself immediately? Not likely – but, I give you permission to fake it until you make it.
Which brings me back to my running. If my only reason to do this was to be able to put a feather in my cap and brag about the accomplishment, then I am not sure I would follow through. That reason is not enough to propel me forward. But, my new identity as a runner will keep me running and training. If I don’t enter a half marathon – I have still grown. I pushed myself, maintained discipline and learned what I can and cannot do.
Aren’t these goals and resolutions supposed to make us grow and learn anyway?
I hope that you are moving forward in 2020 with your goals – but, start assessing what your identity is at this point and the type of identity that you envision for your future. Write down that identity and internalize it. You CAN reach a higher potential – though it doesn’t start with actions, it starts with your mindset.
Get in the game again if you feel you have failed and come out as a winner – I have faith in you!
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